Flutters, Kicks, and a Growing Tummy

I can't believe I've made it 18 weeks in the picture on the left and 21 weeks on the right! At 18 weeks, I was starting to believe this IS really happening. However, I was at the point where I had to come off my metformin and progesterone. I should have gone off it weeks ago, but mentally, I couldn't. I was so scared something would happen. But I finally let go of the medicine at the end of my 19th week and I went to just pre-natals. For the first time in 2 1/2 years I was no longer popping 5-15 pills a day. It is hard to believe I am like any other "normal" pregnancy and have the joy of taking 2 vitamins and my new best friend, Tylenol-and nothing else.

I keep hearing how I will love the 2nd trimester of pregnancy. That it will be the easiest because I'm not too big yet and I am past all the 1st trimester symptoms. Well, I'm not so sure I agree with whoever came up with this theory. I have not found it to be easy at all. The physical part has not been too bad, it has been the emotional. Physically, the worst part has been the headaches. And now at 21 weeks, my newest ache is my feet! Ugh, my feet are just killing me. It hurts to walk, it hurts to stand on my feet, and I wake up in the middle of the night with aching legs and feet. I had one cramp in my calf last week that sent me screaming at the top of my lungs. No matter what is bothering me most, Dr. Graham and my good friend, Jenny, who is a NICU nurse, always tell me to drink more water. I know...if I speak of something that is bothering me the first cure is "drink more water." Well, drinking more water is hard for me because I end up in the bathroom every 10-15 minutes...and I'm not exaggerating. I have almost decided I would rather have cramps in my legs and be constipated than have to run to the bathroom all the time.

The emotional side effects are throwing me for a big loop, and I'm sure Phil isn't loving it either. I feel sorry for him. I cry over everything and EVERYTHING has become a big deal. The fatigue, sensitivity, and river of tears I cry daily at my desk are overwhelming. I was warned this would happen. But I didn't think I would cry over Dancing with the Stars. And I didn't think I would cry when Phil starts talking to me about normal things. I would be very embarrassed to admit the things I cry about and I usually laugh at myself the next day. But in the moment of my puddle of tears, my world is literally coming to an end. I can only thank God that Phil puts up with it. Add to this the fact that I can't make a decision as easy as using a staple or a paper clip in the corner of my paper (yes, I really had to interrupt Phil while he was working in the yard to have him make the decision for me), or forgetting what I was saying mid-sentence, to wondering where I put my keys when they were in my hands to begin with. Pregnancy brain and hormones REALLY do exsist.

The 2nd weekend in May we had our garage sale. We sold an entire bedroom set complete with 12 pieces that was in our old "travel" room for 750.00. Throw in some end tables, a coffee table, kitchen table, a t.v., scrapbook supplies, and lots of knick knacks, we walked away with $1500.00! Enough to buy our bedroom furniture from JCPenny. It was a HOT Saturday morning and before the sun was up, we had people stopping by the house. We sold the bedroom furniture before 7:00 a.m., but thankfully, they had to go rent a trailer and eat breakfast, so we had it as an eye catcher most of the morning.

The 20th week of pregnancy has been the most exciting. I was sitting on the couch one evening during week 20 and I kept feeling little bubbles in my stomach. It felt like a can of Coke had been opened in my stomach. Neatest feeling ever. People describe those first flutters as taps, butterflies, or goldfish in your stomach, but it felt like a fizzling can of Coke. I think I was feeling them before 20 weeks, but I was sure at that moment of sitting on the couch, I was feeling little Nolan. I have quickly picked up on his schedule. How he stays keeps on a schedule is beyond me. He gets going about 2:00 in the afternoon. He flutters away here and there from late afternoon until bedtime. Sometimes I will lay on my side in bed and feel a few flutters before I go to sleep, but after dinnertime is his favorite time to let me know he is in there. I'm almost 22 weeks now, and the flutters have gotten a little stronger. I'm can't wait for the full on kicks. And I can't wait for Phil to feel him regularly. Everyday this gets more and more real.

Both Phil and I are so thankful to God for getting us this far in the pregnancy. We pray everyday that he will continue to grow into a healthy 9 month baby at delivery. I still can't believe I am going to be a mom in a few short months. I often feel like I am living somebody else's dream, but one day I am going to wake up and realize this is our life now. Thank you Lord, for the gift of children.

He's tapping on my stomach now and pushing on my bladder.

Guess it is time to go pee!